Moving Beyond Fear

I’ve struggled with fear for what seems like my whole life. Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of rejection. Fear can be paralyzing.

This blog almost didn’t come to be because of my fear. I was afraid that my words wouldn’t resonate with anyone or that no one would care to read anything that I wrote. I was scared that people would judge me if I was honest about my struggles and really put myself out there.

But one day, I decided to let the call in my heart—my desire to help others who may also be struggling—speak louder than my fear. I decided to feel the fear and do it anyway. 

And do you know what happened? I was rewarded more than I could have imagined. The feedback that I’ve received from my readers has been amazing. I never dreamed that my words would resonate with others the way that they have. I never thought that I would get such heartfelt messages thanking me for sharing my story and helping others to feel less alone in theirs.

Moving beyond my fear has been the best choice that I’ve ever made. Taking a risk and stepping outside of my comfort zone has been so rewarding. I’ve learned about myself and connected with some of the most amazing people because of it. Pursuing my writing has been a wonderful, healing experience for me.

But if I had let my fear win and never gone through with starting my blog, I would’ve missed out on all of the good that has come from it. And I would’ve wasted precious time looking back and wondering what could have been.

So how can you begin to start moving beyond your fear? What can you do to step outside of your comfort zone? How can you stop letting fear hold you back from accomplishing your goals?

First, learn to view failure as a teacher.

Often we are so afraid of failure that instead of chasing our dreams, we choose to do nothing. But if we begin to see failure as a teacher, we may be more inclined to risk failing and use the experience as an opportunity to learn and grow.

Think of a time in your life when you did fail. Ask yourself what you learned from that experience. How did you grow as a person? Learning from our failures helps to build character and resilience in our lives.

Many famous and highly successful people experienced failure in their lives before making it big. J.K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter series, found herself divorced, jobless, and poor a few years after graduating college. But she learned from her failure and didn’t let it stop her, which was ultimately the key to her success.

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all – in which case, you fail by default.”

J.K. Rowling

Take baby steps.

Instead of taking a giant leap outside of your comfort zone, take baby steps towards what you are trying to accomplish.

This is what I did with my writing. Instead of sharing my words with the whole world at first, I began writing solely for myself, for the cathartic effects of getting my thoughts out of my head and down on paper. I didn’t share my words with anyone at first.

Gradually, I began sharing my writing with family and close friends. Then I took the next step to share my words with others in some chronic illness Facebook groups, others that I felt would be able to relate to my experience. 

Once I began getting such positive feedback from this small audience, I built up the confidence to start sharing my work with more and more people. And things took off from there. Soon I wanted to share my words with as many people as I could. The small steps I had taken gave me the confidence to put myself out there even more.

Learn to get comfortable with discomfort.

Humans are creatures of comfort; we naturally want to do everything we can to avoid discomfort or pain. But challenging ourselves to sit with our discomfort and not run from it can be helpful in overcoming our fear and getting out of our comfort zone.

I was recently challenged to step outside of my comfort zone to do an Instagram Live interview. As an introvert who hates being the center of attention, this felt uncomfortable for me. I told myself, “I’m a writer, not a speaker.”

But I didn’t want to let fear and discomfort hold me back from the opportunity to share my message. So I did it anyway. And yes, it felt overwhelming and daunting at first. But I’m glad that I faced my fears. And now I feel a bit more comfortable with the prospect of doing things like this in the future.

The more we practice sitting with discomfort the easier it will become to do things that initially feel uncomfortable and scary.

Visualize your success.

When we’re stuck in a state of fear and doubt, we can easily fall into the trap of visualizing all the things that could go wrong. We picture all the ways we could fail and let that convince us that taking that leap of faith just isn’t worth it.

Taking the time to clearly visualize and imagine all the ways we could succeed, on the other hand, helps to inspire us to take that leap and pursue our passions. Ask yourself what the best possible outcome could be if you did face your fears and accomplish your goals. Even if it doesn’t seem likely, let yourself imagine your success and really feel the good feelings that come along with it. 

Try to take the time to visualize your success as often as you can. And if you find yourself starting to imagine all the things that could go wrong, consciously stop yourself and go back to focusing on the feelings of success. Let these good feelings really sink in and drive you towards taking that first step out of your comfort zone.

If there’s something that you’ve been longing to do but have yet to take that leap because of your fear, I want to encourage you to be brave and do it. Take that chance. Pursue your dreams. Don’t look back in 5 years and wonder what might’ve been had you taken that leap of faith. Feel that fear and then do it anyway. There are beautiful things waiting for you—on the other side of fear.

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